I make the world’s worst sick person. I worse than any man when I’m sick. I alternately want no one near me, yet someone close to cater to my every wish and tissue need. Today I feel like hammered snot. I’m typing this from my sickbed. See what I do for you, The Internetz? I’ll be back in a day or two.
Now, could you get me some Vapo-Rub and tea?