See, what had happened was my drugs kicked in. Not like in a speeding through the desert like a bastard sort of way. Like in a, wow, wonders of modern psychopharmacology way. (At this point I say PRESCRIBED modern psychopharmacology way for my friends who, well, you know who you are and what the rest of that thought is.) So I’m all dopamine-ed and serotonin-ed and tetracyclic-ed. And it is the damndest thing, but did you know—and don’t let me lose you here because this is some revolutionary shit I’m about to lay on you—that if you get out of bed, every day, and get dressed, every day, you can go and do stuff?
WHAT KIND OF FRIENDS ARE YOU DIDN’T TELL ME THIS GETTING OUT OF BED SHIT IS DELIGHTFUL?! IT’S LIKE BACON! YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS? MARGARINE. THAT’S WHAT IT IS. YOU KNOW WHY? ‘CAUSE IT IS SOOO LIKE BUTTAH.
Other than the need to wear pants—or a facsimile thereof—most days this getting up and dressed stuff is awesome. So because I’m not all Howard Hughes-y anymore I’ve got all these projects going on. Writing sort of got pushed to the side.
Which is where I went wrong.
You see, I wrote a little ditty a few months ago about Sandra Lee and how it would be so cool if she went all TableSkape™ on the New York governor’s mansion. Then I wrote a couple more pieces, then, well, honestly that’s when different drugs kicked in because I hurt my knees. Anyway, then I miss—and here’s where I make a point—that Jezebel.com has linked to the blog.
The good news is you got traffic like you’ve never had. The bad news is now they’ve moved on to The Sheen Family Circus.
But see, here’s the good part…I’m supposed to be renovating this website, and it’s not going well. I am overwhelmed. I hate everything. All websites, all templates, I even had mean words with several Adobe products.
What I’m saying is that it’s the perfect time to procrastinate and write!! So here I am.
I could use your help with another project. The other day, my husband brought home–TO ME–the last pork bun from the neighborhood Asian market. If that’s not love, my friend, I don’t know what is. I suppose it could have been the last one because he ate the second-to-last-one in the car, but I think I’d have smelled it on him. So it started me thinking about ways you know you and your honey are a team.
Then, I took that idea, and set it to some awesome Tangerine Dream for this beautiful interpretive dance involving balloons.
Shut up. I did not.
I started listing ways you know you’ve got your honey’s back. And I’d like to hear from you. What are ways you know your and your honey are a team? Tell me in the comments or email me at email@example.com.
I’m going to totally steal your ideas. But the winning entry will receive a digital print customized with his or her Ways You Know submission.